Reading between the lines: Escorts' guide to understanding clients

When you are communicating with clients, you have to learn that sometimes what they don't say carries as much if not more significance than the words you hear them speak. Escorts discuss bookings and details with clients all of the time, but they usually have to read between the lines in order to fully get the gist of what their clients are saying or wanting to know.

Conversation is what many people seek escorts for

It's common for an inexperienced escort to wonder what went wrong during a conversation with a client when things don't go as she anticipated. However, if she had paid attention to what they really meant, instead of what they actually said, she would have a much better comprehension of the real conversation, and could've salvaged the entire communication.

During negotiations to book an encounter, escorts really need to pay attention to those unspoken nuances that clients use. In order to most clearly communicate with your client, consider these common interpretations:

  • "Why do you charge so much?" = "What do I get for my money?" When a client asks this, he is not initially implying that your rate is outrageous or out of line. The unspoken part of that question, though, may pertain to the going rate of other escorts in your area. As far as he knows, he thinks that other escorts charge far less for the same services that you provide. He thinks he can pay less and get the same value that he would receive from you. At this point, it's your job to differentiate yourself from your competition and explain why you set your rate at a specific level. Justify your fees by explaining the cost of a traditional date… where intimacy is sure to be involved. (It usually requires a couple of dates to get to that point, so the cost of those dates should be factored in, too.) Suggest that for a traditional date, he would pay for flowers, dinner, drinks, taxi fares or parking fees, in addition to movie tickets or other costs for entertainment. The cost for two for a night out may easily exceed $300 or $400, conservatively. Then, tell your prospective client that your fee of $250 is very affordable. In addition to justifying the cost this way, inform your client that you provide an experience, not just a sex act. From the time he walks in your incall door until the time he leaves, he will feel cherished, appreciated and adored. That feeling is worth an amount far exceeding your usual rate. However, if he doesn't seem swayed by your arguments, his statement may have simply meant that he is cheap, poor or having financial troubles. When this is the case, he will decline, insisting that your services are too expensive for him.
  • "I don't know if I'm ready to do this or not." = "Tell me you respect me." Clients who say this are complacent with their current situations and may be difficult to sway. They wonder what's available to them within the escort industry, but they are unwilling to make that jump to actually experience it for themselves. This client has not gotten to the point in his life where he is motivated enough to seek out your attentions, other than over the telephone. (He may be close, though, since he reached out to you.) The best way to overcome a complacent client is to assure him that he will receive levels of pleasure unlike he's experienced recently or, perhaps, ever. Persuade him by telling him that he deserves some special time dedicated solely for him. He works hard, makes lots of money, gives to others and should reap some benefits from his time spent toiling away at his career. Encourage him to reward himself with some personal time with you. Remind him that life is short and that he should enjoy the good stuff when he can. Because he was interested enough to reach out to you, he will probably be inspired to book an encounter, despite his original complacency.
  • "I'm afraid my wife/boss/family/friends will find out I'm seeing you." = "Is the time with you worth the risk?" These guys have thought far enough ahead to know how their lives will change if they get caught. They have envisioned their entire existences falling apart with just one indiscretion. Even so, he is willing to take the risk to contact you. While he may be afraid of being found out, he just needs a bit of encouragement in order to move forward with booking an encounter. He wants to be told that he's not a bad person. He desires to hear that nobody will ever know. In fact, part of this sordid secrecy is what he craves about the whole experience. He wants to be doing something he's not supposed to. So, in order to reel this client in, you need to play into his whole drama. Assure him that nobody will ever find out and let him know that you are highly discreet. Once you've assured him that the experience can be completely hush-hush, delve deeper to determine if this client is really afraid of change, which could be an underlying concern. If he's afraid for his current life to change in any way, it may be more challenging to entice him to schedule an encounter. To encourage him, you may need to explain to him that by seeing you, he will become a happier man. As a happier man, he will enjoy those other important aspects of his life even more.
  • "How do I know I can rely on you to give me what I need?" = "Talk to me first." Unless this client has some really unusual needs, you can definitely fulfill his desires, and he knows it. Watch out for these clients, because they are trying to get you to engage in some sort of phone sex or other sex talk that will get them riled up ahead of time. Often, they are timewasters who just want to get some free excitement. They encourage you to share how you will please them, hoping you will give them details and speak about specific services you will provide to them. They may even be touching themselves while you are on the phone with them, getting off on this fantasy while talking to you. If you suspect your client is this type, cut him short and hang up with him quickly. Don't allow him to waste your time and benefit from it for free. However, some clients who ask this question have sincere trust issues. They have experienced rejection or selfishness from partners (and, possibly, escorts) in the past, so they have little confidence in others. When your client is this afraid of trusting you, it's best to tread softly. Explore his issues and attempt to reassure him that you will do your best to satisfy his desires, as long as they don't go against your personal or professional standards. Refer him to your reviews or tell him what other clients have said about you, as a way to show him that others have put their faith in you, too.
  • "I've talked to a few other escorts." = "I didn't, but I love, luuurve my money." Without saying as much, this client is wanting to talk you down to the very lowest rate possible. Through saying that he's spoken to other escorts, he is trying to imply that he's got several other options. He hopes that you will feel that you have competition, so you will cut him the best deal possible, giving him the best "bang for his buck." Don't fall for this. If he's discussed encounters with several other escorts, he's shopping around. And, maybe you are in competition with the others for his business, but it also means that he didn't find the "perfect" escort in the calls he's already placed. Escorts who allow a client to make them feel like they are on the defensive put all of the power into his hands. Clients like this, and they will attempt to exploit it on several levels ranging from rates/fees to perks/privileges to services offered. If you cave on your rate, he will also expect you to be flexible in the types of activities you are willing to engage in with him, in the spirit of competition with other escorts. You have no way of knowing whether the rates, etc. that he quotes you from other escorts are true; and, you should never allow yourself to be put into a position where you feel you have to decrease your value to win business. The best way to respond to these types of clients is to suggest he didn't find what he was looking for previously, which led him to call you. If he persists with trying to talk you into negotiations you aren't comfortable with, kindly insist that he take the other escorts up on their offers, since you can't match them.
  • "I'm too busy right now to schedule an encounter. I'll book later." = "Tell me how unique I am." This client will always be too busy. And, it's very likely that his schedule is full. But, instead of being too busy, what he really means is that he's not sure he's ready to book an encounter. While he found sufficient time to call and inquire about your services, he uses the excuse that he doesn't have enough time as why he can't book at the moment. Escorts who encourage a client to book far in advance will find out that this client is saying something more than he just doesn't have time. This type of client can be developed into a regular if an escort plays her cards right. She already piqued his interest enough to cause him to contact her. All that needs to be done now is to make it as easy as possible for a client to schedule. If none of the times you have available seem to suit this client, ask him what does work for him. Do your very best to fit him in during a time that he states is convenient. By making it easy for him, this client doesn't have a lot of other reasons to decline, unless he lists another excuse, which even he knows sounds slightly pathetic at this point. He will move forward with scheduling, partly to save face and somewhat due to his curiosity about an encounter.
  • "I'm not sure I really need your services right now." = "Are you an interesting person?" Of course, this prospective client needs your services. He has probably been trolling through the online posts for quite some time and finally got the nerve up to call you (and several other escorts). His problem is that he can't believe he actually called… and, he has a hard time accepting the fact that he may need/want your services. Obviously, the desire is present since he sought you out and contacted you. He was curious to hear what you sounded like and to discuss options for an encounter. But, when the conversation turns from what if's to when's, he is tempted to chicken out. There are two ways that an escort can deal with lack of acceptance when she wants to book this client. The first is to get real with the client. Lay it all out that it's evident that he's interested in pursuing something with you more than just a quick phone conversation. Inform him that you realize he has a hard time accepting that he may want/need your attention. Let him know that if he's resorted to calling you, it's unlikely that his current romantic situation is looking up. Tell him that he can either schedule now and start having a good time, or he can prolong his misery and curiosity for a few more months, when he will ultimately be tempted, again, to contact another escort about her services. The second way is to allow the client to nurse his wounds and fail to accept that he is actually going to stoop to seeing an escort. After you've let him sulk and complain about his issues, he may realize what a great listener you are and want to make a booking on the spot. (Or, he may be so embarrassed he hangs up and immediately calls the next escort on his list. Your loss, her gain.)
  • "I don't think you can help me." = "I have no one to talk to." He doesn't really mean this. He is quite certain you can help him, or he wouldn't have called you. This client's hang-up is his embarrassment over the issue that he needs help with. Whether he's got a micro-penis, an STD, a fear of women or a fetish for sweaty feet, he is afraid to fess up to what he wants you to do for him. After being rejected and disappointed by others in his life, this client needs your acceptance, but he's afraid to ask for it. As a result, you may be left guessing what his dilemma is. This is when your communication skills really come in handy. Draw out your client and get him to tell you what his issues are. Frankly discuss his problems and how you think you might help them. Usually, at this point, a client is so happy to find someone who appreciates him and doesn't make him feel weird that he will move mountains to schedule an encounter with you.
  • "I already know how all of this works." = "I want you to lead." A client who arrogantly assumes he's got your policies and procedures figured out just wants to show off. He wants you to think he is much more knowledgeable about the escort industry than what he actually is. By demonstrating to you that he is a pro at this, he tries to avoid being taken advantage of and ends up showing his own insecurities. Realize that this client wants his ego stroked and his experience recognized. The best way to deal with this client and actually get a booking is to go along with what he wants. Take the high road and pacify him with admiring remarks about his expertise and great abilities. Praise his abilities to select quality escorts (which includes you!), and only correct him when necessary, such as about how you desire to be paid or other significant details.