While it's a pretty sure bet that escorts learn a significant amount as they progress in their careers, it isn't often noted that their lessons come directly from their clients. Of course, there are clients who act as business mentors and provide useful hints and tips along the way, adding to marketing techniques or customer service details. But, many escorts actually gain true life lessons after visiting with clients. Not all lessons are good; some are bad and result in negative experiences. But even these less preferable times provide opportunities for learning and progress:
- Don't judge a book by its cover. Although this is taught from the time you start to talk and walk, the clients escorts meet through encounters demonstrate this, perhaps, better than in any other life situation. Clients may appear uptight and conservative, but behind closed doors, they are wild and kinky, delivering on crazy fantasies and obscure fetishes. Charismatic, outgoing types become shy and introverted when alone with an escort. Escorts soon realize after a few encounters that they can't always predict what their clients will be like, just on how they look or what they say. On a less positive note, escorts also must realize that a client who seems perfectly harmless and innocent may actually be a threat to their general wellbeing. Eventually, after several years in the business, escorts may attain a sixth sense, so to speak, that helps them see beyond a client's first impression. But, they still realize that basing all conclusions about a client on a first meeting is entirely impossible, as there are layers that are still to be revealed.
- Compassion and kindness go a long way. Some clients will lay it on thick with an escort, hoping that their sob stories will grant them extra privileges or services. However, other clients are simply in need of some kindness and compassion due to circumstances in their lives. For instance, a client with a disability or disfigurement may be seen as unlovable by society. Their issues make them far from sexy. But, when they visit with an escort, they get an opportunity to feel sexy, desired and loved. It's an escort's job to provide sympathy for a client's unfair circumstances and help him rise above them, even if only for the duration of an encounter. While providing this gentleness to clients, escorts learn how important understanding and kindness are to life. A normal existence requires levels of human compassion toward one another, despite how one looks or sounds.
- Different is not bad. Society molds it members and influences them to think that the goal is to fit in. Being the same is good; sticking out as different from the rest is not ideal. In fact, the concept is so bred into people that peer pressure may encourage them to do outrageous things, just to be like others. As a novice escort, it's easy to avoid the "different" clients who have different preferences, appearances or requests. However, as you gain experience in your career, you may realize that these clients, with their differences, are really the same, underneath it all. They are all craving something they aren't getting from their "normal" existences. They all desire the company of an escort who will provide them with an element of excitement. They all have families, jobs and lives. Regardless of how far from mainstream society they may be, they are just people. And, in fact, with an open mind, you may actually really enjoy these "different" clients more than the "regular" ones. They are entertaining, have great senses of humor and are a far stretch from the standard encounter you usually incur.
- Trust works both ways. Faith and trust in others is a hard level to obtain, especially if important people in your life have let you down. However, putting a wall up between you and the world is no way to live your life, as an escort or otherwise. But, escorts have to be especially weary of new clients. Practical jokesters, timewasters and others will book encounters, only to never show up, getting their personal laughs over the deal. Escorts can't always trust clients at face value. The same is said in relationship to screening clients. You have to carefully check clients out prior to meeting up with them, verifying they are actually who they claim to be. At some point, though, you must learn to trust a loyal, regular client. If he calls with an excuse about why he has to cancel his encounter, it's probably true, especially if he hasn't lied to you in the past. And, as you learn to trust some of your clients, they also gain trust for you. It's a two-way street that is essential in life. Not everyone is out to get you. Some people are basically good and honest, and you have to realize that.
- Acceptance breeds contentment. Many people believe that in order to establish relationships with others, they have to agree with everything they say and stand for. Escorts learn, early on, that this is far from the truth. As you meet up with clients, it's obvious that you may have different morals, values and preferences. However, in order to get along, you don't always have to agree with the client. But, you must be able to accept the differing aspects of his lifestyle. For example, an escort may not be into cross dressing as a fetish that arouses her. However, she may have several clients who desire to engage in this fetish during encounters. She doesn't have to identify with the fetish, herself; she must only accept that it makes a client happy. This leads to contentment on both parts. Accepting certain characteristics or traits of a person can lead to happiness. It doesn't mean you have to agree; acceptance is simply the realization that the other person is happy with the decision or action. Learning to take others as they are is a huge step to happiness.
- Taking time for yourself is essential. Most escorts, especially women, are so busy that they don't take time to do things for themselves that are personally rewarding. They are busy with clients, working their businesses and tending to their families. They often allow their "me time" to slip through the cracks. However, taking a lesson from clients that personal time is valuable, escorts should learn that they need to do things for themselves to recharge. As an example, clients book time with escorts so that they can relax or de-stress. They value that time highly and book it into their schedules. However, many escorts fail to ever schedule in time for themselves. Sure, they may go to the salon to get their hair cut and styled or to the spa for a spray tan. But, these tasks are directly related to work. Take a cue from clients and regularly schedule in some time for you to do something that makes you happy — and, make sure it doesn't directly relate to work.
- You get what you pay for. As clients gain experience in the escort industry, they will realize that the quality of encounter is directly related to the rates that an escort charges. When a client pays more for an encounter, the overall experience should be better. When clients complain about the fees that an escort charges, her first instinct (if she's new) is that maybe she is requesting too much. However, as she becomes more sure of herself, she should realize that her rates are fair, especially considering the market she's in and the quality of companionship she provides. It may be necessary to (nicely) inform a client that he gets what he pays for. If he wants a classy escort and quality booking, he needs to pay more. If he is too cheap to pay high-end rates, he will get a lesser quality encounter. The same is true in all industries. Paying more for a product typically means that it's of higher value and quality. Good clients understand this and are willing to pay premium rates for an extra-special experience.
- Age is relative. Society bases many attitudes about what is acceptable based on age. It's typically thought that when people get a little older, they should be more reserved, conservative and tame. However, this attitude doesn't take into consideration that people retain their same personalities they may have had in their teens or twenties (when wilder behavior is more expected). Escorts see wilder moments from clients of all ages. And, they realize that some clients are truly old before their times. Some 60-year-old clients may be enthusiastic about life and willing to try anything, while other 40-year-old clients are inhibited and concerned with what's appropriate. Escorts realize that the saying "You're only as old as you feel" is very true when it comes to their clients and life, in general. A young attitude can keep an older person engaged and excited about life, while a limited, negative attitude may cause a younger person to seem older than their years. A person's "real" age is unrelated to his physical years; it's deeply meshed in his mental outlook. Escorts shouldn't be afraid to take on older clients, because they may actually be more fun than some of the younger ones.
- Wealth isn't the key to contentment or happiness. After meeting up with wealthy clients who obviously have emptiness in their lives, it's pretty apparent to escorts that a lot of money isn't the key to being happy. Rich people have troubles, too. They get sick, have relationship troubles and have bad luck, just like the rest of society. Money doesn't ensure that a person will be able to waltz through life seamlessly, only incurring good opportunities. Escorts see their wealthy clients at various points of unhappiness and discontentment, that no amount of money will cure. Many escorts hear first-hand about the troubles that their rich clients incur, ranging from financial woes (yes, even rich people have money trouble) to divorces to health problems.
- The power of human touch is amazing. Some people who live alone go days, weeks or months without the luxury of being touched by another human being or living thing. Often, escorts see clients who find common physical affection absent in their lives. These clients crave a simple caress or innocent hug. The positive connection that can be established between a physical touch is immeasurable. Some clients reserve time with escorts just for the sole purpose of cuddling and snuggling with them. They want to soak up all of the human affection they can. Hugging, kissing, embracing and just touching is enough to boost adrenaline and dopamine levels to the point of a natural high, especially for people who lack it. It's something that may not be considered essential, especially if you have it every day, but escorts quickly learn how valuable the human touch is to general happiness.
- Drama isn't fun. Everyone experiences some level of drama in their lives. But, escorts typically meet up with overly dramatic clients as part of their job description. These clients explode over the tiniest misfortune and blow simple circumstances up into major ones. Their problems are always paramount to everything else. And, they always are in the middle of a crisis. Despite how attractive a client might be on the outside, his dramatic flair makes him a very unbearable person to be around. Escorts soon learn to avoid overly dramatic clients, when they can. And, if they can't turn down bookings from these clients, they gently request that they leave their problems at the door. As a result, though, escorts learn to limit their drama to only essential outbursts.
- Don't rush through life. Escorts realize that clients want to get to the "good" part of an encounter and don't wish to waste any time. However, a fulfilling encounter involves proper lead-up, excitement and cool down. Rushing through a well-timed process limits the enjoyment of the booking. Some clients want to rush through all parts of the encounter, only to find out at the end how they should've slowed down and enjoyed the process. Escorts learn this about sex, relationships and life, in general, from their clients. Taking your time and enjoying the journey, whether you're going across town or waiting for success to reach you in life, is essential to fulfillment and happiness. If the end goal is all you're after, you're going to miss a lot of enjoyable details along the way. Escorts learn that slowing down is the best way to create a happy life.
- You can't please everyone. Some clients don't know what they want. Others are unhappy with everyone. And, even more have a very specific idea of what they want, which is nearly impossible to create. While many escorts find that their clients are very happy with them and the encounters they offer, they also realize that they are not everyone's cup of tea. The escort industry teaches that preferences vary and that no one specific "type" will make every client happy. Even the most beautiful, experienced, sought-after escort isn't going to make every potential client happy. That's why there are so many niches in the escort world. Additionally, in life, you can't please everyone at the same time, either. There are going to be times that nobody is happy with your choices. You've got to live with it and move on. Have confidence in yourself and don't allow anyone to make you feel like you're not valuable or good enough. Pleasing yourself is the first key; then, you can focus on pleasing a few others. But, you have to know that it's virtually impossible to make everyone happy.